However Dark the Night...

I staggered through the thick, dry grass. Unseen thorns gnawed into my bare thighs, drawing out blood for their thirsty roots. I paid them no attention, though, for dusk was slipping through my fingers. I moved quickly enough but I had to also prepare to face the horrors of the night. Afraid, I tried to calm myself: however dark the night, the dawn will break…

As I stumbled across the unfamiliar landscape, I could not help but marvel at the eerie beauty of the darkening sky. A shade of unnatural violet tainted the heavens and the idle rays of the dying sun illuminated the land with a perpetual twilight. The sky was clear, save for the monstrous grey smudge at the eastern end of the horizon. This malicious cloud approached at an alarming speed, and with it came pure darkness. Soon, the world was engulfed in its malevolence: night has fallen.

“O Lord of Light, guide me through this night….” The prayer meant little in this godless wilderness. Even if the Almighty heard my plea, He did nothing to aid my misery. I was lost, both mentally and physically. Hopeless and directionless, I wandered into some forsaken forest. But these trees seemed somewhat different. Their gnarled trunks, twisted branches, and half-peeled barks all gave me the impression that the oaks were alive and watching. Watching my every move. Even without the trees, I still did not feel alone. Eyes glittered in the darkness of the forest, but they vanished as soon as I glanced in their direction. Moonlight cast long and mysterious shadows onto the silvery floor, some of which were too short and too active to be merely trees. Once I glimpsed a pale face, its red nose peeking out from behind a tree and its lips twisted into a hideous grin. Though the face had melted into the darkness, I could still hear its distinct chuckling amidst the rustling leaves. This is not reality, I told myself, but nightmares conjured from my unstable mind. All of these things would be gone at the first light of dawn. A wolf howled in the distance and its shrill cry made me shiver and rethink my optimism. I could feel the insanity slowly taking over my senses. I must not let that happen...

The only things that kept me on the verge of sanity were my thoughts and even those were jumbled. I could not recall who I was or where I was. I only knew that I was lost and I must find a way out. I tried to remember, but the only thing that came to my mind was that same phrase, repeated over and over again, “However dark the night, the dawn will break…” But it did little to ease my agony.

Suddenly, I remembered something. That voice belonged to a woman and an image of her exquisite face flashed through my memory. Who she was I did not know, but I felt that she was someone of great importance to me. But the more I thought about her, I felt more anguished: I started to notice more disturbing details of my surroundings: an animal skull under a tree, some peculiar footprints in the dirt, an oddly familiar rock…

While I had reached my mental canyon, the sky had gradually become lighter. I walked past another twisted tree and into… openness. I stared, shocked that I had arrived at a clearing. I lifted my arms to shield my eyes from the blinding sunlight. Dawn had finally arrived to rescue me.

Something hard collided against my foot, and the sudden pain buckled my legs. It was a shovel, half buried in the dirt. A flat slate was erected some distance away from the shovel and there appeared to be some letters carved into the hard granite. I squinted to read: B…E…A…T…R…I…C…E… ‘Beat rice’? No. Beatrice.

The name caused a turbulence of emotions that overwhelmed my very being. Grief, anger, and regret flooded my soul as everything came rushing back. I did not want to remember anymore but I did. “However dark the night, the dawn will break…” Those were her words, the words she used to calm my fits.

I sank to my knees. I wept. I howled at the sky for the injustices of my miserable life.

In front of me stood the grave of the woman I had loved and killed.